After the Date: Lack of Read Receipts Increases My Anxiety
There’s something oddly comforting by the nauseous feeling you get when you’re waiting for a text back from someone you admire.
It’s this mix of excitement, but buoyed by apprehension. This mix of hoping for the best, but expecting the worse. This mix of anticipating reciprocation, but preparing for rejection.
The reason I say that it’s oddly comforting, is because this feeling of waiting for your stomach to drop, of waiting for the butterflies in the garden that is your stomach to take flight or lose their wings, is something that everyone relates to.
Sure, it’s a little like anxiety, but in this moment, maybe there’s a reason behind why you’re anxious.
When you see those three dots typing back a response, your heart drops a little, and when you get a positive response, it rises again, or if you get a negative response, it drops
Now, let’s say it was positive, and let’s fast forward a bit.
You’ve got the reply, you’ve got plans to hang out. You hang out. You hit it off. You drive home. You kiss goodbye. You make plans for the future. You drive away.
That’s when the feeling comes back.
You’ve made plans for the future, but anybody would do that to not seem off-putting after an intimate evening with another person.
So you sit there, in your bed, in your chair, on the floor, waiting for feedback, waiting for some sign that it wasn’t all in your head that the night went well.
It might come, but it might not.
You might be stuck staring at a screen that says Delivered, or worse Read.
And if if that text doesn’t come, that feeling might bubble up, you might question yourself.
But I’ll tell you one thing, a response or not, never let anyone make you feel that way, text or not, good time or no. Any rejection, any lack of reciprocation, is so much more about the other person, than about you.
And while I can’t say I take any of that to heart, I hope you do.